Sleep - toddler and baby and the juggling act!

Sleep is a reoccurring topic here at Baby Steps. I´m sure there are a lot of readers who feel like we do - sleep is vital! Not just for the children but for us as parents too.

 

Now that our 2 year old is settled into nursery, we are seeing a better sleep pattern from him. We have had a few full nights and others with just one brief night  waking. We have, however, had to limit his nap to just one hour. We found that when he slept longer in the day he was taking a long time to fall asleep and waking more frequently at night. I guess somewhere during this year he may drop this nap completely (ahhh then what will I do)?

 

Our (almost) 6 month old has learnt that we go out of sight and he doesn´t like it one bit! At 3 months he was sleeping very well even full nights or just one night waking around 4am for a feed. At the 4 month sleep regression (where babies learn to fall asleep by themselves) we noticed he was beginning to wake more frequently and looking to feed each time. For the first two days I fed him, assuming he must be going through a growth spurt, but he began to wake even more often. I went on a sleep research frenzy and came across the no-cry sleep solution by Elizabeth Pantley. The book is designed to very gently and gradually help your baby to sleep all night. As he had been a good sleeper and I knew he was waking for comfort not hunger, I searched the book and found a very important tip that I had never heard before. Never let the baby suck to sleep - whether bottle, dummy or breast feeding. Ok, so how do you stop this once its a habit? By letting baby suck until they are nearly asleep then gently removing. If he cries replace and repeat. This takes patience and some nights I would remove 7-10 times before he fell asleep but gradually he was able to fall asleep by himself and stay that way for a while.

 

After another month he started to wake more frequently again. Now he wasn´t having a dummy and I wasn´t feeding him to sleep so what to do here? I returned to a method we used with our older son which I discovered from Tracy Hogg the baby whisperer. The pick up, put down method. Her you pick up the baby then place him back down (all the way down even if he´s crying) then repeat until he is calm and drifts off to sleep alone.

This last week he has been waking more again but now I just need to rub or pat his tummy and he goes back to sleep. Every night waking I do this until he sleeps. If he takes a long time to go to sleep or wakes again within 30 minutes, I give him a feed and make sure I finish the feed before he is asleep.

 

Here´s hoping they both sleep a full night (the same full night please) very soon. It may seem like a lot of work but it´s worth it when you are feeling sleep deprived. I´ve found it very hard especially when my husband has been travelling and I have to deal with ALL the wakings alone (sometimes both of them at the same time)!

 

I recommend both of the books I have used as they both have really good ways to help you teach your baby to sleep. Both use no-cry methods which I prefer. I would say though, each family is different, each baby too, only do what you can cope with and if it´s working for you and your family - then it´s just fine. Nobody else has to go through it every night and nobody else knows your baby like you do.

 

Good luck and good sleeps for all parents and babies :)

Sleep at 6 months

Mums and dads need sleep but so does baby. Promoting good sleep habits from a young age can reduce problems in toddlerhood and beyond. Sleep is an issue that we all go through as first (second, third ...) time parents. My guy is no different, he likes to be awake!

The big question is when should a baby sleep through the night? I have many friends who have had an easy ride with their little ones sleeping through the night from an early age. My little man is not one of these babies. We accept he may have to feed in the night and also wake up (we do so why shouldn’t he?) but we also want him to sleep for long periods of time and have restful sleep. So how do we get a balance that we feel happy with?

I have gone through many thought processes when it comes to sleep and concluded that leaving him to cry is against my concept of parenting. He should be able to call for me when he needs something and I have a duty to respond. That said, he does cry... I’ve read a good many books and seen endless web sites but it’s hard to find a ‘how’ when looking for information on self-soothing and putting back to sleep when he’s screaming at the top of his lungs waking up the neighbourhood at 4 in the morning. So here’s what we do...

He has a lovely bedtime routine which I enjoy very much. It’s not for everyone but as I always say, you have to find a way that fits you, your baby and your family. So my guy has tea around 5pm then we watch something quiet like peter rabbit and have quiet play time. I don’t cook or clean in this time as he seems to get clingy and cries if I go out of the room which he doesn’t do at other times of the day, so this is his time. Around 6 we go up for a nice warm bath. He is sitting steady now so enjoys having a splash with the bubbles. This is a great time to sing some songs and he is really cheerful, regardless of his previous mood. After his bath he has a quick massage most nights as he has quite dry skin then it’s into pj’s and his sleepy bag at which point he is usually very tired and starting to complain. He then has his milk while I read him a story then either falls asleep while drinking or is almost asleep when I pop him in bed. He has a dummy at night so pop that in and kiss him goodnight then leave the room. Most of the time he will go off to sleep alone but when he doesn’t, I go back in and kiss him again and then leave again. If he gets himself in a tiz I go and pick him up just very briefly then pop him back down with a kiss and sit near him. If he continues to cry I repeat this until he goes off to sleep. When he wakes in the night and it’s not time for milk I do the same. It is by no means easy but definitely reduces the amount of crying and the length of time he cries for. The fact that I am right there with him helps me to know he is ok and knowing his routine I can be sure he’s not hungry.

For naps he was having 40 minutes three times a day and sometimes 20-30 minutes in the pushchair late afternoon. He had been on a three hour routine but recently after his naps were decreasing in time and he was getting in a state I did some research found Tracy Hogg and discovered that he could manage a four hour routine at this age. Tracy Hogg aka the baby whisperer has some really good ideas about routines and methods for increasing naps and putting back down to sleep. I have used several of her ideas and adapted them for our situation such as the picking up briefly explained above. Since I changed his routine I have been making a conscious effort to lengthen his naps using the same technique as I do at night. He is getting more sleep and has condensed the 3/4 naps into 2/3 naps and is starting to wake less at night. It has taken a few weeks but there is definite progress and light at the end of a long long tunnel of wakeful nights. 

Buy Tracy Hogg's complete guide at

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Whisperer-Solves-Problems-Teaching-Questions/dp/0091902517/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1348068938&sr=8-1