COMPETITION - your chance to win

WIN WIN WIN

It's competition time here at Baby Steps to Independence.

As this weeks post looked at our success story of sleeping through the night we want to help one lucky reader to get the sleep they and their baby deserve.

We are giving away a copy of Tracy Hogg's (aka: The Baby Whisperer) top tips to SLEEP

Here at Baby Steps to Independence our top tip is consistency. Whatever you do to help your baby sleep do the same thing every time so they can become familiar with what is expected at sleeptime.

For your chance to win simply write your top sleep tip in the comment section below (in any language), once you have done this you can get a second entry by liking us on facebook at:
https://www.facebook.com/BabyStepsToIndependenceBlog

Entries must be in by Wednesday 12th December and the winner will be announced on Friday 15th December. Good Luck!!!

Sleep at 9 months

We are here.... we have had our first (and since then several more) full nights sleep. 

We managed to wean him off his 3.30 bottle with ease and a colleague suggested I used the next size up in nappies and most nights this has done the trick (either that or his bladder has grown)!

The clocks went forward here a few weeks ago and we decided to try and keep him on his old routine so he would be going to bed an hour later and hopefully get up an hour later too! It worked for a few days and we managed to keep all feeding times an hour later so he is on a slightly better food routine but it was clear he was getting so tired by the evening we decided to put him to bed just 15 minutes earlier and this worked amazingly. He now goes to bed around 7.30/7.45 and gets up around 6. He still has some milk when he wakes up but we have started weaning him off it and so he has around 50mls in a sippy cup. He’s doing really well on his new routine and we are getting a good night’s sleep. Even the nights he doesn’t go all night we only have to change him or lay him down and he goes back to sleep straight away so we don’t feel like we have  very disturbed nights.

Naps have gotten even more flexible but he is so well rested from his night sleep and getting much more active during the day that it is hard to get a good nap routine going. As he seems quite adaptable during the day we haven’t worried too much about this. If he seems tired we put him in his room for a nap. He is napping very little in the morning now and having a longer kip in the afternoon so I assume he is preparing to drop the morning sleep and go for just one nap a day but I will wait and see what happens. If we go out in the car in the morning he normally has a cat nap and this is usually enough to get him through until he has had his lunch. If we’re at home he can nap at any time so we just watch for the signs and pop him in bed when he shows us he’s tired.

This routine has worked really well for us and we hope it continues throughout the holidays (where he will be travelling to different time zones and climates) and into the New Year. 

Mummy's birthday treats

Today we celebrated my first birthday as a mummy. It has been the most amazing day and we have found there are so many things to teach our son about the special days of others.

He has been part of the planning and preparations and making special things for mummy. I had a beautiful handmade card which he and daddy had spent a morning making. We decided to risk the crowds and have lunch at the beach. With lunchtime and nap times in mind we executed our trip so that our little guy was full and well rested and he was an angel at the restaurant. He sat calmly and played with the few toys we had brought with us and we were able to enjoy a really nice family meal. After lunch we let him have a good play on the beach. He has no fear of the sea and happily crawls towards it and enjoys a splash in the shallow water. He ends up covered in sand and quite damp but its so worth it to hear his squeals of joy and see his big smiles.

Today we also had the great pleasure of seeing a marine turtle being release back into the sea. She had been injured and taken care of at the local turtle sanctuary and now fully recovered was being released back to her home. There was a large crowd gathered on the beach but we managed to find a nice space and our little guy even got to touch the turtle before she was released.

It has been a marvelous day and i’m looking forward to the many celebrations that the next few months will bring.

For more information on the turtle sanctuary visit 

http://www.tamar.org.br/centros_visitantes.php?cod=8

Short attention span – a learnt skill?

I have just sat and watched my 9 month old son play with a small toy car for 20 minutes. And we say children have no concentration. Let me share with you how we as parents teach our children that they should be breaking their concentration.

It all starts when they are a few weeks old and begin to fix their gaze on something – usually a light or bright object. We watch for a short time then go in front of them breaking the connection to get their attention and see them focus on us. Every parent does this, why? Because we want our child to look into our eyes. We want to see them respond to us. We want to be part of their small world as soon as we can. Nothing wrong with that, but it’s good to be aware and to choose the moments when we can be present in their world and when we can step back and enjoy observing their new interest.

So, I watch as my son takes his small car and pulls himself up on the sofa and proceeds to run the car up and down the arm of the sofa whilst ‘brumming’. The car falls on the carpet so he gets down, picks it up and pulls himself up again. The car falls again this time onto the sofa; he cruises round but can’t reach it so he pulls on the throw until he can reach the car. He then returns to the arm of the sofa and continues ‘brumming’. He looks at me a couple of times throughout this process and I just smile but don’t say anything and he continues playing. After around 15 minutes of this continued cycle he drops the car but it goes under the sofa. He gives a frustrated squeak but tries to reach it. After a couple of attempts he really can’t get it so he looks up and cries and says ‘mama’. This is my cue to help him. I ask him if he would like me to get the car, retrieve it and give it to him then tell him to say thank you and return to where I was sitting. He looks over at me then resumes his game. Only after a full 20 minutes does he come over to me and leave his car.

First let’s look at the skills he was using and practicing in this time. He used gross motor skills to pull himself up, small motor skills to hold the car, he was practicing his pincer grip to move the car, he problem solved to reach the car when it was out of reach and he asked for help when he really couldn’t get the car from under the sofa. That is a lot to contend with without somebody speaking to you or playing along with you.

If I had spoken to him when he looked over at me I would have broken his train of thought and therefore his concentration. If I had moved to where he was playing or taken a car and joined his game I would have interfered in his stream of thought and therefore broken his concentration. When he asked for help if I had continued to be with him or started to ask him other things I would have broken his concentration. By stepping back and just observing I was able to give him the chance to complete his task and remain concentrated on what he was achieving.

Of course I am not saying we never play with our children or stop them if we need to. Life happens and they have to be adaptable especially in such a demanding world as it is today. I am merely pointing out how it is very easy to teach your child to break their concentration by interrupting them when they are so engrossed in an activity. I have done it on many occasions. Often my son is startled when I speak to him and it is only when I see this reaction do I realise how deeply embedded he was in what he was doing.

As a parent all I can do is try to let him experience things for himself whenever I see he is concentrating hard on something, giving him the opportunity to use the time he needs to complete his task and hope that he has good concentration skills as he grows. Then, enjoy every moment that he chooses to interact with me.

Children learn what they live...

At the Social Good Brazil seminar

As the Social Good Brazil seminar is taking place this week, I thought it appropriate to remind us all that we are role models for our children. 

He is a little poem to inspire us to raise happy children for the world.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.

If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.

If children live with ridicule, they learn to be shy.

If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.

If children live with tolerance, they learn to be patient.

If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.

If children live with praise, they learn to appreciate.

If children live with fairness, they learn justice.

If children live with security, they learn to have trust.

If children approval, they learn to like themselves.

If children live with acceptance and friendship, they learn to find love in the world.  

Why celebrating is important

Celebrations are a great way to give culture and education to your children. 

Where do you start?

With bonfire night happening back in the UK I was sitting here in Brazil (where nobody knows the name Guy Fawkes) thinking how nice it would have been to wrap my little guy up in his snowsuit and show him a bonfire and soak up the atmosphere. It is one night I do miss a lot not living in England now. It also made me think how important these outings are for our small people. I remember the smell of the air, the excitement at being out in the dark and meeting up with school friends. I want my boy to have memories like this too, maybe not for 5^th November but there are so many other things to celebrate and it all begins at home.

I’m sure we have all thought about the first birthday and how we would like the day to go. I will be planning and executing my boys first birthday very soon and I have had to take a step back and see what he can get from the experience and plan it for him too not just for me and my expectations. I want him to have a calm day but with surprises and the people who love him around. I know I will have to be careful that he gets good naps the day before and try to organise some quiet time on the day so that he doesn’t become overtired or over-stimulated. I want him to have a fun day and play with his favourite people – me and his daddy!

So far in his short life we have had several celebrations to contend with. With each event I am learning with him and seeing how he seems to enjoy social events more and more. As Halloween has just passed I think it’s a good example to use. I like to make things with my boy so we got out the paper and crayons and began designing simple costumes and scribbling away in dark Halloween colours. I have always found that the preparation of these events can be as exciting as the actual thing and I plan to have a lot of fun with my guy while we prepare for parties. It’s also a great way for him to acquire new language and learn more about his world (and I am learning too)! We made a little robot costume but he really didn’t seem comfortable in it so I decided to let him wear normal clothes and he went as a Harley Davidson biker (but as he had a broom he was Harley Broomerson). He helped to colour a big box and I made a simple withes hat and we spent a day or two playing with it before the party so that he could see how fun it was when mummy wore a weird hat. I think it’s important to prepare this way as it can be quite daunting for someone so small to see his close people looking very different. The day of the party I made sure we were home all morning so he had time to crawl about and nap well. The party was in the afternoon so I organised the food he would need and made sure I knew what time I would leave to get him home with time to spare so he could play and relax before having to go to bed. All the planning made for a wonderful afternoon. He was a little apprehensive about the other children all dressed up to begin with but when he saw everybody smiling and laughing he soon relaxed and enjoyed being the centre of attention.

I try to celebrate many events with my son so he can see there are different cultures and ways of life. He already has two different cultures and I want him to know as much as possible about his world. There are always printables available online. My favourite site is http://www.activityvillage.co.uk/ where they always have fun colouring pages or activities for young children.

What is your favourite celebration and how are you making it special for your children?